Friday, January 15, 2010

Foot in Mouth

Have you ever said something that you look back on and totally regret? I am normally someone who thinks everything through before I speak and this is usually sufficient in keeping me out of trouble. But, every once in a while, this thinking everything through tends to get me into major trouble. I say major trouble for two reasons. The first is that I tend to over think things, especially when a situation is highly emotional. Second because I always end up doing it in writing. When a flub is made verbally you can immediately apologize and rectify the mishap, but when it is in writing there is no going back.

My latest foot in mouth episode came while I was trying to help a friend feel better. I kept running her situation through my mind and I felt so bad. I felt helpless but I wanted to give her some sort of comfort. I ended up sending a message to her. While I wrote it, I could only think of trying to lend her a bit of my faith and hope. After I hit the send button I realized a big mistake....the story itself I used probably did the exact opposite of what I had wanted it to. It was too late; I had already hit send. We both would have been better off if I had just kept my mouth shut and just prayed for her.

I don't know if she reads my blog anymore or if she has burned me off of her list, but just in case I will say now that I am more sorry for what I said that you will ever know. I only wanted to try and make you feel better but I realize that my message probably made it so much worse especially considering the situation. It would seem that even someone who has suffered the brunt of many unthoughtful comments can be the unthoughtful person who makes those comments. I hope I am never that unthoughtful person again.


the misfit said...

Do you know how she felt when she read the message? However stupid something is that someone says to me, if I really know they didn't mean it to hurt me and they let me know they're really sorry, it's not an issue. I tend to get really upset at people who do things that indicate that they care too little to think about whether they'll hurt me - and then never take things back or apologize, because they never spared a thought for the effect it had on me. Those people are worth avoiding because they make our lives worse. But foot-in-mouth people? I'm one of them myself. If I refused ever to talk to someone because they said something ill-judged or awkward, I wouldn't have any friends!

Christine Dallimore said...

I very HIGHLY doubt you could ever say anything to someone that would be offensive. I have never experienced this from you anyway. In response to your last comment on my blog- I seriously have NO idea what you are talking about girl!!! :0) Your comments and words have been nothing but encouraging and inspiring to me. I believe it was your comment on my "Uncle" post that really helped me. It was one that stood out to me and comforted me- SERIOUSLY. I love reading your blog. I don't love that you are having such an ordeal to work through right now, but I do love your sweet personality that shines through your words. You have given me hope in so many different ways- you have no idea!!! Just keep being you because YOU are just wonderful!!!!