Wednesday, May 6, 2009

Baby Dreams

Lately I have been plagued by baby dreams almost every night. They are extremely vivid, causing my arms and my heart to ache every time that I wake up. I have had these dreams before but it is usually just for one or two nights and then they are gone for a while. There is one other major difference between my recent dreams and the ones that I have had in the past. In each of these new dreams, the baby is adopted.

In the first one my husband and I had been speaking to a few different birth mothers. Our case worker arranged for us to go and meet one of them in another country. It was just supposed to be a meeting, nothing more. Once we arrived the girl went in to labor and then just handed me the baby and asked me to take it. We didn't have anything for the baby; no clothes, no car seat. I just had this baby handed to me and I had no idea what to do. But at the same time, I was filled with such love and such intense emotions that even my writing about it for this post is causing me to tear up.

There have been a few other variations of the "baby dream" but this first one was the most powerful and has stuck with me the longest. What I don't understand is why the switch to adoption? The hubby and I haven't talked about adoption for quite a while. I don't know anyone who is in the process or even talking about adoption. There are plenty of people who are pregnant...shouldn't I be dreaming about that?


organize-n-mama said...

You never know what dreams can really mean. Maybe you guys need to look into it a little more. You guys will adopt and as soon as you do you will discover that you are pregers. Well at least I have heard of that happening. I pray for you all the time that you get the joy of being a mother. I think of you often. Love ya sista!!!

the misfit said...

I'm not sure I would try to force a meaning or a reaction...I mean, if you assume the dream means that you're called to adopt and you try to make yourself deal if you're not ready, that will probably cause more upset. Maybe just...accept the open to figuring out what it means if that comes to you...try to keep your eyes open for next steps cropping up in your life? I always want to have a meaning and a direction too, but I find they tend to sneak up when I'm not paying attention...